I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
