just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
