If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
