those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize