It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
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You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed