I just saw a hot homeless man
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I am one with the molecules
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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