you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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