i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Randomize
