I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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