I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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