Got a toothbrush?
I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
