Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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