girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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