I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
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