She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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