I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
They took my balls.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
