Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize