I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize