Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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