They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
