Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
