idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
