i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Operation Purity has been aborted
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
