think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
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