love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
