the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
He felt like a one man threesome
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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