i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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