Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Randomize