just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
