Swine flu. Run for my life!
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
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Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
foreskin is a definite game changer
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
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didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?