I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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