I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize