You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
