Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
