went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
