It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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