I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I AM VODKA MAN
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
