God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize