I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
