Pappa wants mamma naked
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
