you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
