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• (585): View more from New York

  Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?

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• (862): View more from New Jersey

  It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?

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  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (915): View more from Texas

  You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday

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• (323): View more from California

  well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (956): View more from Texas

  I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"

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• (928): View more from Arizona

  I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?

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• (716): View more from New York

  I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  Pants are for mortals

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