id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
