I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
