SEEEEXXX PLEASE
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
