I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
