help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
