I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Randomize