i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
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