Buhtt sex?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
