so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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