He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
i came on her dog
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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